However, just as often, you might find yourself realising that you should have never made those plans to begin with. If you're a friend, you get the benefit of the doubt a few times before I stop trying to hang out with you. In this instance it's easy to want to keep stringing them along as you make and then cancel a whole new set of plans because you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. forsook. Sometimes you don't want to collide two different sets of friends and that's understandable, but make sure you do your best to keep it honest. Psychology Today points out that it might be time to look at your behavior a little: Perhaps you have a bona fide conflict, or a bona fide stomach bug. If you want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you have to tell the truth when you flake out. “She gave me a quick check over to be sure I wasn't going to flake out on my way home.” Verb Past tense for to leave behind or stop caring for someone or something. -hot girls are flake outs as a general rule, it's … In these cases it's good to try and reschedule a plan to another day or time. If the answer is no, your behavior needs modifying. You should just go ahead with them, but if you can’t, then suggest a new plan. Coco Davies adds that you need to remember the value of your time and be careful when making plans in the first place: Don't over-commit. Flake A flake is someone who generally makes plans with you, promises to do things with or for you but can never seem to follow through. Whether someone will be upset if you flake out depends not only on the person but also on the situation. Don't flake on me. left. They’ve blocked off their schedule or modified it so they can see you. Photo by Alfonso Surroca. }. If this sounds like you, then it’s probably time to reassess how you’re handling your day-planning. As I’ve said a few times already, flaky friends aren’t reliable and you can’t have … broken with. quit. Instead just tell them the truth, no matter how stupid it sounds. If that doesn't work, see if you can meet up with your friend afterwards. I'm a stickler for punctuality and following through on plans, but my main social circle is incredibly flaky and always canceling. How do you flake out on plans and still keep your friends? If this sounds like you then it's probably time to reassess how you're handling your day planning. If you've ever made plans with someone only to realize you really don't feel like following through on them you know that it's incredibly difficult to flake out on those plans without being a jerk. For example, not showing up to someone’s wedding would be considered extremely rude in any social circle. At least now you only have to wait 25 minutes instead of longer later on.” I posed this question to you to see what types of creative methods or other suggestions you might have. To renege, as on a social engagement: Sorry for flaking out on you last night—I had to work late. abandoned. Nevertheless, if a woman continues to flake you would be advised to forget about her and move on. 3 and 4 probably are derived from the adjective flaky, meaning “eccentric.” [c. 1970] 5 50,000 women have attended his live events and he has reached over 10 million online. But I probably just need to get over myself. Suck it up and accept the fact you’re a jerk. Suck it up and accept the fact you're a jerk. Coming up with a ridiculous excuse is only going to dig the hole deeper for yourself, especially if you get caught in the lie. abdicated. }. In 2017, researchers found evidence that communicating through speech as opposed to text has a profound impact on what we think of people, and reminds us of their human qualities. Coco Davies adds that you need to remember the value of your time and be careful when making plans in the first place: Don’t over-commit. Last edited on Jul 24 2010. By subscribing you agree to our Terms of Use and Find more similar words at wordhippo.com! They’re unreliable. Perhaps you realized later on that you don't want to hang out with the person. They've blocked off their schedule or modified it so they can see you. Be honest with yourself: did you truly intend to go in the first place? While the event might seem inconsequential to you it's possible your friend set aside a large block of time to hang out and you're ruining that. I'm going to stop inviting Samantha to do stuff with me because she always ends up flaking out. Want to learn more? To fail to meet someone … Please acknowledge that. If that doesn’t work, see if you can meet up with your friend afterwards. In a lot of cases when you're backing out of a plan at the last second you have a legitimate excuse. quitted. Enter your email below. So the next time somebody flakes on you, kind of just say to yourself, at least I found out that they’re a disrespectful person and they’re very self-centered. Which leads us to our next tip. Offer up a new idea for something to do that fits better with what you and your friend like to do. How about you? It's actually a big problem for me because I find it really disrespectful and it really bothers me. Before you go on a murderous rampage because a guy keeps flaking on you, maybe the more logical thing to do is to figure out why he’s flaking out on you. screwed. Don’t flake. If you want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you have to tell the truth when you flake out. It might indeed be your own behavior as Psychology Today points out, but it's also worth looking at the friendship in general. In this instance it’s easy to want to keep stringing them along as you make and then cancel a whole new set of plans because you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Last edited on Jul 24 2010. “I like you, and I would like to build a friendship with you — but when you flake out on me, I feel disappointed and disrespected. [1] Okay, now let’s look at the word flake: as a noun, one definition of flake is a single turn or several turns of rope in … It can also mean getting her number but when you try to get in touch with her to set something up or to talk, she ignores it and doesn't get back to you. How do you flake out on plans and still keep your friends? It’s understandable if you don’t want to collide two different sets of friends. When the time comes to actually execute on those plans, you might realise it’s not really your style. When confronted with their behavior they usually get defensive and run away. There is a slight chance that he’s doing this not because … left behind. You probably won’t have to worry about him flaking on you after this. So I'm curious about something. F laking out or having a woman flake out on you means she agrees to go out with you for a date but backs out within hours or continually does it to you, leaving you "on the hook" forever waiting for her.. I posed this question to you to see what types of creative methods or other suggestions people might have. Jane doe promised to go out with me. As a verb, to fake (down) means: to lay out rope in long flat fakes, each one overlapping the previous one, so that it is ready for running. Your best option is to not make those plans, but if you need to bow out, here's how to do it gracefully. ditched. orphaned. For example, She just flaked out and we had to call an ambulance, or This project is flaking us out. siteads.queue.push( {"site":"lifehacker","pagetype":"article","ad_type":"article","sec":"work","amp":false,"ctype":"article","article":"how to flake out on someone gracefully","article-tags":["etiquette","relationships"],"native":["null"],"aggregate":["etiquette","relationships"],"pageID":["null"],"sub-sec":"communicate","cat":"work","cat1":"communicate","ad_location":"mrec-content-mobile","targeting":{"pos":"2"},"provider":"google-dfp","element_id":"ad-slot_mrec-content-mobile_section-index-1_pos-2"} ); Photo by Wonderlane. Attempt to reschedule if possible. See more. Spewing out vitriol about sensitivity and snowflakes is the equivalent of trying to convince someone that they’re crazy and your words could not possibly have been hurtful. You’ve taken someone’s time from them. If the answer is no, your behaviour needs modifying. If you’ve ever made plans with someone only to realise you really don’t feel like following through, you know that it’s incredibly difficult to flake out on those plans without coming across as a jerk. siteads.queue.push( {"site":"lifehacker","pagetype":"article","ad_type":"article","sec":"work","amp":false,"ctype":"article","article":"how to flake out on someone gracefully","article-tags":["etiquette","relationships"],"native":["null"],"aggregate":["etiquette","relationships"],"pageID":["null"],"sub-sec":"communicate","cat":"work","cat1":"communicate","ad_location":"mrec-content-mobile","targeting":{"pos":"1"},"provider":"google-dfp","element_id":"ad-slot_mrec-content-mobile_section-index-1_pos-1"} ); When you tell a lie you're giving them reasons not to trust you or worse, you're coming up with a whole fiction you'll have to remember. If I bring it up with them, I always end up feeling like the asshole even though they were the ones who were inconsiderate and canceled. Anyone who flakes on another has no excuse. stranded. These people don’t stay my friends for very long. It's simple, but it's a good point to remember. Attempt to reschedule if possible. But, the point is that when we flake on people, it shows a general lack of respect for others. dumped. Regardless of whether you're cancelling plans way ahead of time or at the last minute it's good to apologize for wasting their time. Etiquette blogger Emily Post points out a really good reason why: The person you’ve cancelled on could easily feel like second best, especially if you give the impression that this new opportunity appeals to you more than spending time with her. It's all fun and games until someone beats your h... Take the quiz; True or False? If you want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers, you have to tell the truth when you flake out. To flake out on someone It is exceedingly rude. Coming up with a ridiculous excuse is only going to dig the hole deeper for yourself, especially if you get caught in the lie. Be honest with your friends about the time you have, and tell them if you can't make it. This might be as simple as, "I really just want to lay on the couch doing nothing right now." Through his online programs, viral internet broadcasts, sell-out seminars, NYT Bestselling book, and his roster of private clients, he has been able to pass on his insights and strategies to countless people. Yes, I wish to receive exclusive discounts, special offers and competitions from our partners. The rumor: People who flake out are just scatterbrained; it’s OK to cut them some slack We all have that friend who’s a bit of a flake. Honesty is always the best policy. flake out Slang 1. Etiquette blogger Emily Post points out a really good reason why: The person you've canceled on could easily feel like second best, especially if you give the impression that this new opportunity appeals to you more than spending time with her. As on a social engagement: Sorry for flaking out on plans and still your!, Rena Schild ( Shutterstock ), Rena Schild ( flake out on someone ), and tell them you! Second you have to tell the truth to tell the truth, no matter how stupid it sounds see... Friends and co-workers you have to start with the same thing: apology... With you ask that much anyway flake out on someone blocked off their schedule or modified it so they can see you once..., not showing up to someone ’ s probably time to reassess how ’! A True emergency in which case you should have never made those to... A plan at the last minute ; to fail to attend or go through something! Time from them a True emergency in which case you should have never made those plans begin. 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